LaFrance Administration Sells Big Tent, Uses Proceeds to Buy Small Tents

The long saga of Mayor Bronson's ill-fated Sprung Structure, slated to become a navigation center, has come to an end. After spending nearly $200,000 on storage fees to store the controversial structure in Washington, the city decided to spend another $988,000 to ship it to Anchorage in order to sell it for $360,000 and will use the funds to buy thousands of Coleman Sundome 2 Person tents and Outback Steakhouse gift cards to distribute to persons currently experiencing houselessness.

"Everyone deserves a new tent and a Bloomin' Onion," the mayor said in an interview.

The mayor also announced that the city will be opening a sanctioned campground near the cop shop on Tudor and Elmore and will be operating as a "low-barrier, wild west shanty town".

"We couldn't be more pleased," the mayor said through a wicked grin.